Day 1: So far so bad
Usually I start my day really pissed when the alarm goes off. I lay in bed cursing for a few minutes, nothing coherent just pure expletives . After the cursing I check my email, txts, weather, things to do today, etc. For that I would use my phone. Fail. So instead I get dressed. and walk over to my computer. I see the g/f has emailed be which is great until I realize I'm horrible at writing and find it hard to express myself the way she does. In the past sending a text saying "I love you" or "looking forward to seeing you tomorrow" would be enough. Now I feel obligated to write as much as she does which is like pulling teeth.
After staring blankly at the screen for a few minutes I get dressed quickly so I'm not late to work.
I'm using the camera my gf got me for xmas to help paint a picture
Wait for the train in the cold. I'm really looking at my surroundings for the first time in awhile. Like a really jaded newborn what I see is the gray sky, the dead trees, the freak show that rides the MTA (myself included).
Saw this midgety mexican looking dude on the train today. He was fun to stare at for awhile. I kind of wanted to pick him up and take him to work with me. I could keep him in a book bag and take him on adventures.
I also notice people on their phones having a great time. So I look at them pathetically remembering the great times with my phone. There was this one dude on the train that barely looked up from his phone to see what stop it was, he didn't even notice me taking this picture of him. And his phone was a real piece of shit so I dunno what he was so enthralled by.
It's like I'm mourning the loss of a loved one. I'm more bummed now then I was when my uncle died, or when my cat died (the cat who I liked much more than the uncle)
Went to Mc Donalds to get breakfast
Got a Big Mac, Even now I know how gross of a choice that is but it seemed right at the time
After work I was wondering what to do, see a friend that was bartending stop by a friends house to visit maybe walk around get some coffee or something. But I realized without google maps handy I really don't know where the fuck I'm going, especially in Brooklyn. So I just went home. Defeated.
On the bright side, for dinner tonight I had some grilled chicken with black beans to make up for my shitty breakfast. I would have taken a picture but I was too hungry and in no mood for pictures. So use your imagination. Now on to some drawings I've been behind on, followed by going to bed maybe a masturbation session thrown in there somewhere just for good measure.
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